Next Stop: Moving On

So, I didn't get into a dietetic internship program. And I can sit here and list all the things I shoulda coulda woulda done better. I can sit here and sulk deep into the muddy pits of rejection and voluntarily dig deeper...but for the same reason I've learned not to touch a boiling pot of water, I will not go there.

Sounds like
...really hot oil the moment you add in raw meat.
Looks like
...wrinkled Idaho potatoes.
Smells like
...hard-boiled eggs that have been in the fridge for over a week.
Tastes like
...orange juice after eating a piece of chocolate.
Feels like
...sunburn...enough said.

I wrote that during my lunch break at work today. Locked myself up in the lunchroom like a recluse and hid beneath the heavy aroma of day-old bread donations from Panera. It was raining then. Cold, Chicago rain. Watched the world wash my troubles away. I wrote that while I was developing Nutrition Assessment Questions in English and Spanish. I couldn't help it. I found out about this rejection a week ago, and for whatever reason, it's hit me harder and harder as the days go by.

Everyday, I give my supervisor and coworker a ride to the train station. Everyday, we talk about our lives outside of work, and bond. Other than the fact that the two ladies happen to be 40 years my major, I see a part of me in both of them. I learn a lot from them. I confide in them. Maybe it has something to do with the fact that I'm a huge fan of emotional catharses while on the road. Or maybe, just maybe, they're supposed to change my lives, I just don't know it yet. Maybe they already have, and it's just one of those things that take awhile for me to really know it.

"Move on," the Supervisor exclaimed after I told her I didn't match for an internship, "Take that supervisory position and move on." Two words were all it took. MOVE...ON. It's pretty simple. I can say that "it's harder than it sounds" but I'm thinking, maybe if I do just that, I won't waste time thinking about how hard it's actually going to be.

So, I've decided, I'm moving on. I'm taking the world by storm. I'm not going to let anyone or anything make me feel inferior. Only I, can ever let myself feel like that. I've always wanted to learn the hard way, right?

"This, too, shall pass."